Proverbs 31:10-31
Psalm 128:1-5
1 Thessalonians 5:1-6
Matthew 25:14-30

Character

Our reading from the Book of Proverbs depicts an ideal household, where strength of character, which underlies fair dealing and a vigorous work ethic, drive out all fears and cares. Yet in many parts of the Gospels, we find a life depicted that resonates with men and women who live in monasteries and convents or who follow the Franciscan path of Apostolic life in the world, not in families. These readings not only call us to live, but even demand that we live, what Saint Francis called "Gospel life," and which frankly deprecate family life. Indeed, Francis, Clare, and their fellows rejected the affluent homes of their families. This is a common story among the saints. Here is a small sampling of what I am talking about drawn from all three Synoptic Gospels:

But the Trappist monk, Thomas Merton, OCSO, reminded novices at his own community of silent Cistercians that religious life is not what God has in mind for everyone. Otherwise, the entire human race would disappear in one generation. No. The ordinary state of Christian life is marriage. You know, ordinary is a solemn word in the ancient Christian tradition deriving from the Latin word ordo, meaning "how all things are ordered." This is why the Church Kalendar and Church rites are referred to as Ordo. God orders his human creation through marriage, from which family inevitably proceeds in most cases. No, religious life is not the highest form of Christian life though faithful religious life certainly has its own dignity and high worth. The holiest vocations, without question, are motherhood and fatherhood. Through this sacred gate proceeds the greatest miracle commonly seen which is the birth of new life. And this mysterious and beautiful fellowship which the Lord calls "one-bone, one-flesh" calls those who enter it to personal holiness, absolute faithfulness, and daily devotions expressed in the form of self-sacrifice. The family is the original church. When was the Church founded? When God created humans. And it is the basic element and building block of the entire human lifeworld. As our own society has experimented with alternatives to God's plan, our psychologists tell us as that a child needs a mother and a father.

Amongst the many different interpretations of the Parable of the Talents, which we read this morning, all interpreters must reckon with the overwhelming fact that a talent, so imposing a weight or value of money, is sufficiently great as to eclipse every other detail in the story. The ancient measure of a talent of gold is equal in volume to one amphora, which is one cubic foot ... of gold(!), which today equates to 1.25 million dollars. Anyone hearing this parable would immediately be captivated by this stupendous sum. "To one he gave five talents ..." And this, of course, was Jesus' purpose: to scale the responsibility being offered to the achievement of a lifetime. In that sense, Jesus is telling these men, "I give you your entire lives. What will you do with them?" In this light, the story is not so outlandish. For isn't this the case with all of us? One talent of gold? Nearly everyone in the U.S. will earn at least that much salary in a lifetime. So, here are all your future earnings given today at once. In that sense, the Parable of the Talents is similar to the Parable of the Prodigal Son, who receives his entire inheritance at the beginning of his life rather than in old age.

What will you do with it? Many of us would go out and buy a big house and a yacht and a Ferrari and, without question, a Harley Fat Boy with all the high-end options and chrome. But soon we would lose everything because we have been foolish. We will lose them all because we cannot maintain them, and because we have made no provisions for our needs and for our loved ones. Soon the family will have nothing .... and less than nothing, for there will be no family once these fault lines have opened.

A talent signifies a lifetime, and a lifetime is a very great gift. Our earnings, really, are the least of it ... especially in the eyes of eternal Heaven. What will we do with this great gift? Much of it will depend on what happens along the way. If you should meet your true soul-mate, sent to you by Heaven's will, that man or woman, completing your own incompleteness, will become your life. And you will have entered a very holy vocation, living out your side of an endlessly deep and deeply meaningful relationship. Should you receive children, each of these will be worth far more than five talents. In these living, breathing gifts, you will have been granted not only the care of precious lives, but of precious lifetimes, even unto everlasting life, for love never dies, and life never ends. Each one is beyond price, and, without question, sacred. And each is of infinite value in the eyes of God — your wife (or husband), your children. As the parable this morning teaches, nothing is more important than these responsibilities ... which helps us to understand why the lazy and careless steward is bound and cast into outer darkness where there is wailing and gnashing of teeth. For he has failed to countenance the infinite value of the sacred trust given him.

At a time, when so many families are fractured, we might ask, how do absent fathers see themselves in the post-family lives they have chosen? I have known quite a few in the course of my twenty-five year ministry. I have heard absent fathers say that his gift to his children is showing them what "cool" looks like. Or he is showing them that he has been true to his dreams ... or should we say, daydreams and fantasies? In my ministry I have met men whose past is a trail of children by several women and who have told me, referring to themselves, "This outlaw's had a good run." You might be surprised to learn that quite a few men (and some women) like to refer to themselves as "outlaws" ... with a sense of pride. They are proud of their tattoos, of pictures of their motorcycles, but most of all of the stature they imagine they possess in the eyes of nervous bystanders. More important, much more important. I have met their sons — lost young men, possessing no skills, wandering through this world seeking the approval of .... anyone.

The gift of the gold talent. How easy it is to miss its essential irony! It is a vast fortune, to be sure, but it invites us not to riches, but rather to self-sacrifice — to a beautiful personal poverty that emulates that of our Lord, Who countenanced each of us to be His sacred trust (Jn 18:9). All that gold is wondrously heavy to bear. Try to pick it up. But that is nothing compared to picking up the weight of the several lifetimes that belong to your children. And all of this becomes the weightier in the knowledge that it belongs to God, entrusted to each of us who are mothers and fathers. For each life proceeds from God and is being carried and guided toward God. When we talk about "taking the measure of a man," we come much closer to understanding a talent — how a man "weighs in on the scales" or how he "hangs in the balance." And this is the literal meaning of the Greek word talent: scales or balance. Indeed, one ancient meaning of a talent is the weight of a man in gold.

In the meantime, life can be cruel, and rude surprises and setbacks will come. All the promise with which we began can get detoured. And we may feel that we cannot give our loved ones all that we had hoped to give them. But in those moments we must remember ourselves ... and go back to basics. For filling a house with warmth or making sure that a child is loved and cared for, even the fragrance of a hot breakfast, is of great value to children. During the years I lived in shacks in Vermont and New Hampshire and Maine, having no central heat, I learned the meaning of a warm room, of hot food, and of the rock-solid dependability of men and women. We call that character. What is the value of character? You cannot acquire it from a showroom. It is never gaudy in public. And its value, both on earth and in Heaven, is far beyond five talents.

Perhaps this is some of what flooded into Robert Hayden's soul when he wrote ....